when i was in the depressed state and wanted people to care for me, i wasnt calm enough. I wanted people to ask me how am I, how i feel, and i realized i put in more of 'I...blah blah' in my convos. at that time, i'd tell myself its okay that i'm feeling this way and that it will pass. now it did, but i have to continue practising. to be able to care for others like i did in the past, i must first be calm. because i did lots of meditation in the past and was at least calmer, i was able to ask about how the others are doing almost all the time. fortunately, i'm becoming calmer now as i start with metta meditation, and it slowly allowed me to see why i was feeling the way i did before and after.

life now is comfortable. nice place, nice bed, nice people, nice teachers... thankew daddy mummy for the opportunities and everything. really. Loving you and come back from Tibet soon to tell us all about your trip!